Sports Set to Shart on Iconic Bellagio Fountains (Again)


Fresh off of F1 defiling the Bellagio fountains, ruining the iconic photo op for millions of Las Vegas visitors for months, sports are about to do it again.

Plans have been announced to block the view of the Bellagio fountains for the Super Bowl.

We are, as the kids say, over it.

Bellagio needs to unrender this eyesore.

The only bright spot is the disruption around the Super Bowl isn’t going to last for four months, as it did during F1. Just a month and a half.

Closures of parts of Las Vegas Boulevard (southbound) are scheduled to happen Jan. 3-4, 2024 for construction of a studio for CBS Sports.

Sidewalk views of the Bellagio fountains will be FUBAR through Feb. 16.

Small consolation for the visitors who face crushing disappointment as the glorious Bellagio fountains are obscured by the CBS Sport structure.

Casinos and public officials had a freak-out during F1, because many visitors stayed away. They’re blaming social media influencers for “scaring people off,” but the fault actually lies with the boneheads who think these events are more important than quintessential experiences that have made Las Vegas the ultimate destination.

Las Vegas is currently experiencing peak short-sightedness.

It’s simple: If you love Las Vegas, you have to hate sports.

Beyond the spoiling of the Bellagio fountains, beer and Doritos ads are going up on the side of Luxor.

Honestly, it’s just gross.

This isn’t a just Super Bowl thing, or a personal bias against sports. The Super Bowl is a big deal to concussion fans, we get that. After all, we were the first one to share that Las Vegas would host the Super Bowl in 2024, way back in 2020. We are a noted sports expert.

But hosting an event doesn’t mean they get to ruin Las Vegas for everyone else.

That’s right, it’s ruined.

F1 is still cleaning up its mess, and it’s been a month since the event.

International travelers couldn’t care less about the Super Bowl, and officials need to stop signing off on using Las Vegas as a backdrop or “extra” when sporting events come to town. Las Vegas is a star and should be treated as such. During the televised F1 race, you couldn’t even tell where it was taking place, by the way.

Far more people don’t care about F1 and the Super Bowl than care about them.

And don’t get us started about the ways hosting the Super Bowl hurts Las Vegas. Casinos are always full for the Super Bowl, but hosting the Super Bowl means gamblers (of great value to casinos) are pushed out for legions of sports fans and people associated with the event itself, the NFL, production personnel, and related entities. In other words, non-gamblers.

In the industry, it’s called “peaking the peak.”

We asked that you not get us started!

Anyway, we have so few rules. One of them is no tilting chairs to save slot machines. Also, no paper straws. Another is don’t ruin iconic photo ops for tourists. That includes grandstands and TV studios blocking the Bellagio fountains, and no clothes of any kind on statues.

Casinos and elected leaders need to learn how to say “no” to things if they hurt more than help. If the decisions are too hard, just send them our way. No draining the canals at Venetian. No blocking the volcano at Mirage, especially given the fact it’s not long for this world as Mirage transitions to Hard Rock. No guys with signs that say, “Kick me in the nuts, $20.” No food or drink vendors on The Strip. No memorials to sad things where tourists can see them.

These aren’t gray areas.

Don’t put a jersey on the goose that lays the golden eggs.


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