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We are a fairly big fan of chicken parmesan, a timeless dish that sprang from the rustic rolling hills of Italy in the 13th century and if you believe that we have a bridge in front of New York-New York to sell you.

Anyway, it’s not Italian, but as the kids say, we DGAF.

Our love of chicken parm knows no bounds, so we’re going to share the best chicken parm sandwiches in Las Vegas, because writing stories about the openings of the new Fontainebleau and Durango casinos would involved “effort,” and we are not only a renowned chicken parm expert, but also a world-class procrastinator. Let’s do this!

A.I. likes vegetation, clearly. We’d pick it off.

Chicken parm isn’t taken seriously by serious food people, also known as “people you want to strangle after five minutes of bloviating about what other people should and shouldn’t enjoy.” You know, asshats.

Food critics haven’t been relevant since 1975, honestly. People like what they like and Yelp wins. Get used to it.

Our first pick is the glorious chicken parm sandwich at Esther’s Kitchen in downtown Las Vegas.

If we could only eat one thing for the rest of our life, this might be it. Assuming chocolate chip cookies weren’t an option.

Not only is this the best-tasting chicken parm sandwich in town, it’s the most photogenic of the various chicken parm sandwiches.

Our only qualm is this sandwich is only on the lunch menu at Esther’s Kitchen, which is why we don’t eat it every day, as that would involve waking up before noon.

Our second choice for best chicken parm sandwich in Las Vegas is also a bit off the beaten path, which we realize was a huge missed opportunity to say “off the eaten path,” but we have no time for “doing things over to make them better.” This is a blog! We only move forward!

Santa Fe casino’s new Stallone’s Italian Eatery serves a selection of garlic knot sliders, one of which is chicken parm. It’s $6.99 for one, and it’s the food equivalent of going down a slide made of tongues in a Viagra bathing suit into a pool full of labium. But in a good way.

Look, we are not a foodie, we just know the sandwich at Stallone’s was delicious. It was also very healthy because garlic is a vegetable.

The only thing better than this is drunk this.

Our final selection for the top three isn’t pretty.

It’s another new offering from a casino in the Station Casinos family, Durango.

The casino has a food hall where you can find Uncle Paulie’s Las Vegas. We heard good buzz about the place, so had to try the chicken parm.

As we mentioned when we first shared a photo, the sandwich resembled a crime scene, but we persevered. Mind you, we warned them we’d be taking a photo for our blog. Whatever. The sandwich was fantastic!

If you don’t want to get your hands dirty, why in the hell are you having a chicken parm sandwich?

We’re fairly sure you have other ideas about the best chicken parm sandwiches in Las Vegas, and we’d love to hear them, as long as you agree with us.

We trust we haven’t had all the chicken parm sandwiches in Las Vegas, so please let us know if you have a favorite.

The best chicken parm entree is another subject entirely, of course.

Our favorite overall chicken parm in Las Vegas is at Triple George, across from Downtown Grand. They used to have a chicken parm slider, but it was a loss leader, so now it’s old-school chicken parm.

We have begged the management at Downtown Grand and Triple George to bring back a chicken parm sandwich or slider, but to no avail.

The price went up (it’s $38), so now we only have it on special occasions, but we have a lot of special occasions.

The other best chicken parm in Vegas is at Al Solito Posto, in Summerlin. Not served in sandwich form, but it’s life-altering. Not surprising, since the chef (Chef James Trees) behind Al Solito Posto is also behind the aforementioned Esther’s Kitchen.

Slap the complimentary focaccia around this, chicken parm sandwich.

An also-ran in the chicken parm contest may be a surprise. When we’re mid-Strip, we hit Carlos’n Charlie’s for their Parmesan Swiss Chicken. It’s not exactly authentic Mexican fare, but they don’t claim it is, so chill.

Probably should’ve saved our labia metaphor for this dish.

Modesty precludes us from mentioning the fact our ongoing love of this dish resulted in our being included on the Carlos’n Charlie’s menu, rating the dish six out of five stars.

Also worth mentioning are the chicken parms at Superfrico at Cosmo and The Palm restaurant at the Forum Shops.

We asked ChatGPT to describe chicken parm, and we now believe A.I. could be our spirit animal: “Golden-fried perfection embraces succulent chicken cutlets, their tender flesh encased in a delicate armor of crisp breadcrumbs, whispering secrets of savory spices and golden hues. Adorned atop this masterpiece lies a symphony of flavors—a scarlet robe of tangy marinara sauce, kissed by the warmth of sun-ripened tomatoes and fragrant basil, cascading in rivulets of vibrant zest. Atop this crimson cascade rests a regal crown of melted cheese, a harmonious blend of milky mozzarella and aged Parmesan, weaving a blanket of creamy indulgence that gently enwraps the ensemble. Its rich aroma wafts seductively, weaving tales of culinary prowess and culinary artistry. The plate, a canvas for this culinary masterpiece, becomes a stage for contrasts—a tapestry of textures and colors, where the golden-brown allure of the chicken meets the ruby-red embrace of the marinara, all while the ethereal cheesiness transcends the senses in a melty crescendo. This dish, not merely a meal but a sonnet sung by the Italian kitchens, evokes nostalgia for a homeland of rolling hills and sun-soaked vineyards, a celebration of flavors that dance upon the palate in a symphony of ecstasy, each bite an ode to comfort, warmth and culinary opulence.”

It feels like A.I. might think chicken parm came from Italy. Awkward. We pressed further, and ChatGPT said, “While its roots are traced back to Italian cuisine, the specific form of Chicken Parmesan as we know it today largely developed and gained fame within Italian-American communities in the United States.” Accurato!

Chicken parm is the ultimate comfort food, and thankfully, Las Vegas has lots of options for this magical mixture of chicken, sauce, cheese and bread. Chicken parm is Nature’s perfect food. Unless you’re a chicken, but for the rest of us, definitely Nature’s perfect food.

Let’s hear what you think.



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